Sunday, April 24, 2011

I have a friend who I had lost touch with for quite a few years... truth be told we had a HUGE falling out, and never spoke for a long long time. We did however add each other as facebook friends! Kind of ironic. Anyway... I noticed from her posts over the last years that they were trying unsuccessfully to have a baby, and finally were resorting to invitro. I used this as a way to make peace with her.. we had something in common again (the falling out was really stupid anyway, just two really stubborn people involved) So, they ended up going a couple of months before we did, and it worked, they were expecting twins! This was wonderful, and we chatted and emailed our way through our pregnancies.... until mine was cut short. We still chatted a bit, not nearly so much. And then she had her boys a month and a half early. One little guy is at home with them, and the other has been having a lot of trouble with infections and his intestines, so he's still in the hospital.. this is I think four months later. I feel for her, really truly, it has to be tough, and it must wear a person down. But she's been posting about how miserable it is lately, and just then put "another holiday in the hospital :(" as her status. I am having a really hard time not commenting! Listen lady, be thankful he is on the mend!! He has been doing excellent according to all previous notes and statuses... he just needs time to build up his strength. It's looking like he will live a normal life, once he gets to go home. Oh man how I would love to write "better in the hospital, then in an urn on your mantel!" grrrrrr! Sorry, her pity party doesn't match mine! I feel really awful for these negative thoughts, but it just makes me want to scream! They deserve there little guy.. but you know what... we deserve our daugher as well!
Happy Easter everyone.

6 comments:

  1. The nurses at SickKids spoke about how the parents would come in on the weekends or whatever to see their premie in the NICU... I remember thinking, WTF- I would be there every second of everyday. Heck, I felt guilty when I slept in the waiting room or the special "family" room- and I'd been through a c-section just days before.

    I know people get tired and need to go home, and that being in the hospital is so overwhelming and exhausting... But I hear you there my friend. I guess it's all about perspective.

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  2. Oh man. I have similar relationships. People who I lost touch with but then bonded through pregnancy with-- until Andrew was suddenly gone, then I also thought those relationships should dissolve.

    Yeah, careful what you say-- I read this a lot-- since someone else likely has it worse. It's really hard to swallow comments like that, especially today.

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  3. I am Rachel from Waiting for Morning. We just found each other. I am so sorry for your loss. Ugh! I feel your pain. I would love to stay in touch. You said you are struggling and I would LOVE to be a source of encouragement to you. I am a good listener. Feel free to email me at aubreyandellie@gmail.com Happy Easter!

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  4. omg, that would piss me off. that is why i am not on facebook anymore. I probably WOULD say that and then delete her. lol! like you said, she deserves her baby, too but just be glad he's alive! grrrrr!

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  5. While reading your post I was thinking the exact same thing as you. It sucks to have a baby in the hospital, but at least he is alive. It's hard to act like you don't feel sorry for them, because I do feel bad to see babies and children sick, but just know being in the hospital is better than dead. Sorry to hear the reunion with the old friend isn't going well.
    Happy Easter!

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  6. Must be very hard not to say anything... hope you have had a peaceful Easter. Love always xoxo

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