Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Conversation with a two year old

"Mommy is Kevin here??"
This is the question I faced as she got out of bed this morning...
"Kevin? Like Uncle Kevin??? (hoping that's what she meant)
"no Kevin... where our baby is"
"Ohhh Heaven... No honey, heaven is way up in the sky... where the angels are"
"So you don't have a baby in your tummy anymore?"
"No sweety, she was too tiny when she came out of Mommy's tummy, so the angels took her to live with them."
Blank stare...
"can I have oatmeal for breakfast?"


  1. It seems so sad when they say those kind of things, but sometimes(for me)it helps to ease the sadness I feel by having me focus on their needs. When I came home from the dr office and had to tell my kids about the twins not living anymore they were all sad and shocked. My 7 yr old was sad, but then said, "I'm hungry, what's for dinner?" It did shift the mood of the household, if even for a moment.
    Take care.

  2. It is so sad, but I also like that she thinks about Kristen.

  3. Aw, what a sweet little peanut, I'm sure you were choked up while waiting to hear her finish her sentence.... I love how kids react to things like this...

  4. I've had so many conversations like this with our toddler... such a hard idea for them to grapple with and understand. I find that every month or so she has an added layer of understanding... and has even started talking fondly with others about her "little sister Gabrielle in heaven". Breaks my heart. Love to you always xoxo

  5. I'm sorry, but that gave me an awesome little chuckle. I love how the conversations that crush us are nothing to them. "Can I have some oatmeal?". Gulp. I think I have written to you before, but I am waiting for my son to start asking questions. He turned 2 the day after his sister was born and died. I have no idea how much he knows because he hasn't asked and we didn't talk about the pregnancy much when I was pregnant b/c he seemed so young and I thought I would wait until he could feel her moving around. We were just about there when I went into labour and it all ended.
    I know it must seem so heartbreaking to hear Jenna talk about her sister, but I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to know that Avery understands that he has a sister. I hope that doesn't sound awful, but it breaks my heart that he doesn't know about her. But, maybe I will change my tune when/if he starts asking. who knows. Can I have some oatmeal?

  6. Sorry, I meant that I know I had written to you about my son not knowing about his sister before. I know I have written to you before. I hope that wasn't confusing...

  7. I didn't know the best approach either... we had told her about the pregnancy quite early on... she was two and 2months just about to the day when Kristen was born...... and the questions keep getting a bit more detailed as time goes on. At Christmas we were in church and she just kept saying "mommy you lost your baby?" luckily, it was while everyone was singing and not praying, or it would have been a LOT harder to deal with! I do like that she knows... or that she tries to understand anyway. Although sometimes when it's out of the blue, it can take my breath away!

  8. Wow- the things little kids sweet and innocent. Definitely understand how that could take your breath away.

    Sending lots of love


  9. :( Ahh to be young and innocent again.

  10. Those converstaions can be hard, but so sweet too. Maddie knows about her baby sister Emily and she often asks to look at the pictures. We never say no. She also loves to hug the bear that was given to us at the hospital after Emily died. It is so sweet, she calls it "emily bear."

  11. Stopping by after finding your blog on My Angel Baby's sight.

    Sending big hugs across the country.