Where to begin.....
Today has just been all around hard. I spoke to Jenna on the phone, and ended up a mess... I miss her so much, and everytime I think about her, my heart breaks with not being near her!
My Mom came to see me for the weekend, they live in AB, so it's not a super long flight to get here. It was sooo nice being able to spend the time with her, but I'm super sad and homesick now that she's gone again. Amazing how a 33 year old woman can still just want her Mommy!
I changed my flight to Friday after things were delayed because of the overstimulation..$300 later.. plus the extra nights lodging, plus the extra meds I had to buy while here... just added stress! It's all expensive enough!
And the biggest thing is of course, it's the 19th again. Another month has gone by without my precious baby girl!
Anyway, today it kind of all came to a head, the combination of these events, and all the hormones left me crying in the middle of lunch with Mom, and some of our family members that live in the city. I tried to pull myself together in the washroom at the restaurant, but just couldn't seem to stop crying! I HATE that!! I'm better again now, but for a brief while, was wondering if I would completely melt down in public. This is HARD! I knew it would be, and I knew that not having Ken or Jenna with me was going to suck... I had been managing to deal with all the stress, until today.
There is a bright spot through all of this though.... 15 of my eggs have fertilized normally! With Jenna we had 10, and with Kristen 12.... so this is the best we've been at this stage of my cycles so far. They will keep me posted every morning as to how my little embryos are doing. And in turn, I'll keep posting on here! I've said it before, but Thank You so much for following along with me. Your support has meant the world to me. Especially on days like today!