Thursday, December 29, 2011

Finally get to see some Flower Girl Pics!

One of the hardest things for me to miss while on bedrest was the wedding that Ken and Jenna stood in this October. The only picture I've seen of that wedding was from further away, and not the clearest. FINALLY the bride has added some of her pics to facebook, and I'm stealing them to share because I'm so darn proud of my little girl!

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Not to be a downer on Christmas but..............

This has to be the worst Christmas Eve in my books, okay nope.. last year won out for obvious reasons, but I was in a cacoon of grief and barely recognized the fact that it actually was Christmas.
This year, Ken's working until Monday, we have plans to make that our Christmas Eve, and do our dinner on Tuesday. Which leaves me here tonight more homesick than I've been since moving here... missing my husband, missing Kristen, and SOOOO SICK of being helpless. My MIL is here tonight too in an equally shitty mood because this really should be Christmas Eve, and we're too mopey to even pretend like we feel like celebrating. I know that she's sick of this whole situation too... let's face it, she's tired of living up here taking care of me and Jenna, and just wants her life back to normal as well. It's been nearly 12 weeks of this, and we're exhausted!
I've mentioned my rational brain last post, and it's still there, telling me that I'm doing this for a good reason, and that this situation is only temporary. But it does nothing to make me feel good about tonight. sigh.
Anyway, look forward to a happier post from me in a couple of days when I finally have my hubby back, and we can pretend like we're celebrating Christmas like a normal family! Sorry to be such a baby tonight, but this is the only place I truly feel safe venting!
Love to all.. and truly, I hope you are having a Merry Christmas!

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Sorry everyone... 28 weeks 4 days (blush)

Wow, didn't mean to get ahead of myself, I reread my post before publishing, but obviously not the title! Thanks for the support though!

29 weeks 4 days and all is well!

I had my weekly appt yesterday, and thankfully all is going well! My cervix is still measuring 2cms which is perfectly fine.. thanks Mr Cerclage (or maybe Mrs) for doing your job! And Carter now weighs roughly 2 1/2 lbs! Grow baby grow! Now that I've past 28 wks I'm allowed to sit at the table from my meals from now on! Yayyyyy no turkey dinner on the couch!
Ken doesn't get home this year until Boxing Day, so I've rigged Jenna's advent calendar so that she runs out of choclates that night, and that's when Santa is going to visit our house! lol! The worst thing about this whole bedrest scenario is that I would normally throw myself into baking and running around to take my mind off of spending Christmas here and not in Alberta...... but now all I have to do is lay around and think of the family and friends I'm not going to see this year (pity party for moi!) My rational brain knows that even if I wasn't on bedrest, this year would be spent here in NL. But I don't always think with that part of my brain!

Sunday, December 11, 2011

I have been MIA lately, but didn't realise it has almost been a month since my last post! I've still been reading just about every night, and have (finally) been able to start commenting again! Thanks Lauren for the comments, and prompting me to actually sit down and write this post! I love knowing that you are out there cheering me on as we go through this battle!! Funny term for a pregnancy, but that's what I feel the last seven months have truly been.... definitely a battle worth fighting though!
I'm 27 wks as of yesterday! Things have been going good since the cerclage was put in place, and my cervix has remained steady. I'm allowed to come downstairs in the morning now, and go up again at bedtime, but still have to remain strictly on the couch. I can't imagine staying like this for another couple of months, but obviously I'll do whatever is best for Carter, and try to keep him safe inside me for as long as possible! I love this little man so much, and as we get closer to a safe outcome, even if he were to arrive early, I feel more and more confident. Every day I have with him is truly a blessing!
I'm glad we have most of the baby stuff that we'll need, because even though my confidence is rising.... I still fear the worst.. I know that if he were to arrive now, his chances of surviving are pretty good, but part of me is still so scared that it won't be enough! I haven't bought anything for him just yet, and don't know when I'll have the confidence to do that. All he'll really need is clothes, and diapers and such, so it's not so bad... not like I have to order any furniture, or purchase any bigger items. I know that if he were to arrive this early, we'd have time to shop for him while he's in the NICU (not the outcome I'm hoping for) I'd much rather get to 36 weeks, and bring home a full term little man!